Karma, you are such a bitch!!

A few weeks ago I was talking to a friend of mine about what NOT to get women for Christmas, namely vacuum cleaners, appliances, or anything to do with "losing weight" like gym memberships or ab-rollers. Why the heck is it that 2 days before Christmas my vacuum decides to kill itself?

Now I want one. I want a nice new shiny vacuum with a pet-hair attachment. I want the Cadillac of vacuums. I want one I can depend on, one that makes my freakish anal-retentive cleaning habits happy. But darn it, the last thing I want to spend MY money on is a vacuum. I seriously would take one as a gift this year, and I might not even complain about it..... well, not that much anyway.

So, here's to Karma that stupid bitch that just bit me in the ass today. I am toasting this apple-cinnamon vanilla kahlua drink I concocted to Karma. Merry Christmas.

Let's play a game...

It's called, "Let's see what's in your fridge!" Ok, you guessed it, I am a little bored. First of all, it's freezing rain outside and I can't go anywhere. Second of all, I am trying to avoid making a big bowl of buttery popcorn I don't need. But let's face it, sooner or later I will cave. And thirdly, I have a few friends that may be in need of a chuckle while they recover from treatments, surgeries, or maybe just holiday blues.

So, how exactly do you play this game?, you ask. Well, I will start. Take a picture of your fridge.




Ok, you don't have to put in all the fancy little labels, but I thought it would be a nice touch. This is where the game part comes in. Seeing what is in my fridge, can you make a meal out of this? I thought it would be a little fun challenge for you. Let's start out with a Kahlua & Baileys on ice, shall we? Ok now your turn. Comment away with my next meal.

Pigs don't bark

Well, that's what I tell my bundle of joy when he barks at nothing. Seriously, if you ever wonder why I call him "my little piggy" this ought to give you some idea how he comes up with that nickname.


Oh, and he snorts too.



Now, you are asking yourself, "Why are you posting a picture of your dog's junk?". Because. It's funny. And I have had to see nude pics of your kids when they were babies, and I am getting you back. I don't know, I just think this one is hysterical. This was taken in my office where I had to use a space heater before the ole' boiler room kicked on. Now, he normally just sits in front of it, but THIS, my friends was a pug-o-graphic moment just waiting to happen.

Seriously, what a pig!

Pizza Rolls, Cream Cheese, & Chardonnay

Ah yes, a gourmet dinner for the elite!! What can I say, I had a craving and just so happened to have Pizza Rolls in stock - what a bonus! And if you have never tried this, dip those bad boys in cream cheese for a twist - yum!!

And I have only had a few sips of the chardonnay, so at least I won't gross anyone out with "cat poop" emails like last time I drank too much and sat at the computer. Sorry, ladies, I just couldn't help myself!!

I found this wine in the clearance bin at the grocery store for $3.99 a bottle!! It's actually pretty good, so I went back and bought 6 more bottles. With all the holiday entertaining coming up, it will definitely come in handy. Wait, who am I kidding? I am drinking it all to myself!! Just call me Wine Grinch.

I guess when you are tight on the budget, you become somewhat of a tight-ass. You just can't help it. You hoard things that are super cheap deals, but you hesitate to tell anyone in case they go and buy it up! You sit at home and go through the grocery ads to see who has the cheapest things on your list, and you actually go to 3 different stores just to get the deals!! You don't use coupons because we all know it's not a savings - well, it is for you LABEL SNOBS that can't buy store brand.

You wait until your shutoff notice comes for the cable and phone to pay it and you only pay the minimum, because maybe you like playing that little game by now. HA! I will get them, I am NOT going to pay my bill - I like to tease them with thinking they are going to shut me off! Then WHAM! I pay the minimum! It's really a win-win if you ask me.

Oh, and my favorite? Is how you are always talking to your friends about how tight you are with money and then you go and spend money on something frivolous!! So what your saying is, hey I would like to hang out with you, but I would rather buy myself a DVD player so I can sit at home and watch movies from Netflix, which, by the way, costs me $14.99 per month!

Ah, the joys of a reduced income....

Somewhat of a rant.....

Ok, it IS a rant.

Today I spoke with a customer that was a total F'ng C*NT. If you know me, you know that I don't just throw that word around, it truly only goes to the well deserved.

I am not going to get into the details, because you probably wouldn't get what I was talking about anyway, but let's just say this chick needs to get laid or maybe just an old fashioned bitch-slapping. How anyone can go through life so miserable is beyond me. She was completely rude, called me "Veronica", and was acting as if I didn't know what I was talking about. Well bitchbag, you are the one who doesn't know wtf is going on - you are the one who called us, remember??

I tried to be as helpful as I could without being condescending myself, but that stupid bitch hung up on me!!! WTF???

Ahhh...I feel better already....

Just remember when you call up "customer service"," tech support", etc. you are talking to REAL people. Maybe you will think twice before being rude to someone on the phone. They are just trying to do their job - and maybe...just maybe...you should thoroughly explain yourself and be patient. Don't expect people to read your mind - because guess what - we can't.

From now on, I am going to fill out every customer satisfaction survey I get. Now that I know how important it is for customer service reps to get feedback, I will take out that 10 minutes of my life to fill out a form.

And now I am going to have a glass of Chardonnay and have a toast to all customer service, tech support, and application support personnel I know - GOD BLESS YOU!!!!

Tis the season...

Today I am finally going to break out the Christmas decorations, since the rest of the city is donned in lights - I figured it's about time I get with it. Everyone has their own little holiday traditions each year, some with family and some with friends, but mine consist of a tradition with me. Ok, one year my mom helped - but ask her about it some time and she will probably tell you it was not very much fun for her. Sorry, Mom, I know I can be a bit anal....ok a lot.

My tradition consists of decorating my house and putting up my tree all while listening to Christmas music and drinking wine. Sounds normal enough, right? Well, it's the way I decorate the tree that might seem a little rigid and maybe even psycho to some. I have a specific order in which things go on the tree, and for 10 years it has not changed.

1. Put on the Christmas CDs - Nature's Nutcracker and Nat King Cole's The Christmas Song
2. Uncork and pour the wine - Usually a chardonnay or a pinot grigio
3. Put up the fancy mantle garland I made (has silver bows on it)
4. Refill my wine glass
5. Put out any other silver decorations ( a silver santa, silver mini dried flower pots, silver runner, starting to get the picture?)
6. A little more wine....
7. Assemble the tree (I used to have a fake tree, but gave it away when I moved)
8. Top off my wine glass, heaven forbid it actually gets down to less than half full

And, no, I have not forgotten about the last and final steps of decorating the tree, I just think that it deserves its own little list.

1. Lights first - only white lights are allowed on my tree
2. Do I need more wine? Sure do!
3. Load up the silver garland and strings of beads - 2 sizes of each totaling more than 8 strands of silver
4. Check my wine glass
5. Bulbs are next, and guess what - they are all silver! I have 2 sizes of bulbs and probably somewhere along the lines of 75 of them. I am actually going to count them up this year just for kicks.
6. A little more wine....
7. Time for the bows!! Silver, of course!
8. Now the silver ribbons !!
9. Fill up the wine glass, I am almost finished!!
10. Place the Silver Santa on top of the tree, sit on the couch with my glass of wine, enjoy the music and the beautiful tree, reflecting on the past year's events - all of which seem kind of blurry at this point.

Yup, by this time I am pretty buzzed up from all the wine....it's a pretty great tradition if you ask me.

This year is a little bit of a bonus - I am going to make this a 2 day event. I am going to put up all the decorations out on one day, and the Christmas Tree comes later. I figured since I am getting a real tree, I will wait until the last minute when hopefully the trees will go on sale. I will probably end up with a Charlie Brown looking tree, but who cares. Once that thing gets doused with silver, you won't be able to recognize it anyway.

Well, it's almost noon so I best be getting myself to the store to grab the wine. I think one bottle will suffice for today's activities, but I am going to grab two - because in my house there is a rule: Do not EVER let yourself run out of wine!!

Confessions of a Shopaholic

I must make a confession - I LOVE to shop. I love to buy clothes, shoes, purses, makeup, perfume, housewares, books, office supplies, ok - must I really go on?

One of the reasons I am in the financial state I am in is because of my luxurious shopping and traveling habits of my 20s. I still am paying for things that have long since vanished - sold on ebay, given away, etc. Since I decided to finally get some help with my credit cards 3 years ago, I have basically withdrawn myself from that nasty habit. I have not used a credit card since, well really because I can't, but I pay for everything with cash. Ok, so I have had to borrow money once in a while to get through the month, but mainly everything that I have is paid for and mine.

How does one transition in life from buying Coach purses, Ralph Lauren clothing, and Franco Sarto shoes to shopping second hand and clearance shopping drooling for the latest bargain? Well, when you do not have a choice, you just HAVE to.

Yesterday I fed my little shopping habit by going to the Goodwill store. For $33, I bought 2 pairs of jeans, 2 sweaters, a t-shirt, 2 purses, and a pair of shoes. Ok, I could have done without the purses, but they were too cute and cheap to refuse! Here is one of the purses, I picked it up for $3.59 and it is brand new - the little silica pack was even still in it!! Is this purse TOTALLY me, or what??


For those of you who don't know, one of my favorite games to play is Scrabble...so when I saw this for 99 cents - I just had to buy it!



I actually made it through the jeans part of shopping with out crying...."Halleluijah!" I found 2 pair that actually make my ass look hot! Well, in my eyes anyway - and that is all that matters! The only downside is that they are way too long. Ah yes, one of the pitfalls of my body type - regular sizes are too long and petites make me look like Urkel. Seriously, if I could afford it - I would have custom jeans made.

You are probably asking yourself - why are you out shopping for yourself when it's the holidays and you are supposed to be shopping for others? Well, cause, that is what I do. :) I don't exchange gifts with most of my family anyway - not for a lack of wanting to, but it just makes sense we hold on to our money and save up for visits and trips. One day, we will be able to go back to exchanging gifts - soon, I hope, very soon!!

Now that I have fed my shopaholicism, it's time for me to get back to feeding my other disorders: ADD and OCD.

Ahhhhhh........

That great feeling you get when you wake up after a great meal and 12 hours of sleep!

Yesterday started out with Bloody Marys, which is a family tradition that I CAN'T go without on Thanksgiving! Since I am so far from my family, I thought the least I could do was uphold the tradition!! Then my friend Lucy and I made a martini stop (vodka, dirty, shaken-not stirred) then headed over to her sisters house for Thanksgiving dinner.

YUM, YUM, YUM!!! What a great meal we had - an Italian salad, rolls, rigatoni (yay for pasta and homemade sauce that took 2 days to cook!), turkey, stuffing, gravy, potatoes, sweet potato casserole (SOOOO yummy!), green bean casserole, and of course, wine. It was an excellent meal, and I even left room for dessert!!

Let's see...the choices were just awesome: pumpkin pie, pecan pie, pecan creamy cheese pie, blueberry creamy cheese pie, brownies, and of course "crack cake". I opted for the 2 creamy cheese pies which where really light and AWESOME. Lucy made those in the morning while we drank the Bloody Marys. Then, I had a small piece of the "crack cake". WOW!! I don't know what her sister does to that cake - but if you know me, I don't really even like cake, so that's a HUGE deal!! It is making me want to experiment more in the kitchen with my baking skills!!

I brought home some of the sweet potatoes and a slice of the "crack cake" which I proceeded to eat this morning for breakfast.....mmmmmm.

Yesterday was one of the days I have been looking forward to since I started this whole "new eating lifestyle" I am trying. I wanted to be able to eat some great meals on Thanksgiving and Christmas and not feel guilty about it. Well, it worked. Yes, I was full last night - but not uncomfortable. Which, I have to say, is a first. The fact that I have my portion control under control and also that I eat smaller meals more often - certainly helped when filling up my plate yesterday.

Mission accomplished!! Now I can get back to the 4 meals a day without hesitation so I can look forward to some other fun holiday eating this year - guilt free!! :)

While everyone else is either shopping or working today, I am going to do some things around the house. First thing is moving my computer back into my office. The other day I blew a circuit and lost power in my office - so I had to move everything into my dining room. It was a pain - but at least its all fixed now.

The other thing I am going to do is sort through all my beads and make some jewelry. I haven't made jewelry in so long, but now that the weather is starting to turn - I will definitely be getting back in the habit. I am going to make some things to sell on ebay for the holiday season! My prices will certainly be reasonable - because with today's economy, people are strapped for cash and I totally know how it is!!

I hope everyone had a wonderful Thanksgiving!!

Creative cooking, awesome parental units, and holiday stuff....

In no particular order...ok yes I will talk about them in order, c'mon you know my borderline OCD won't let me do otherwise!!

Creative Cooking

So, as you know, I was talking about this "fad" diet I have been doing. Well, it's actually beginning to stick to me. Weird, huh? Anyhow I have strayed a few times this week, but all in all I think I have done really well. Especially considering my salt and butter addiction. First of all, I have stopped cooking with butter and salt - replacements: extra virgin olive oil and salt-free seasonings and fresh herbs & spices. Yea, I can hardly believe it myself!! It is amazing how much better my food tastes prepared that way!!

So last week I went on my first trip to Whole Foods (yes, you heard me, my first time!!) and bought some great stuff! First of all I have a whole new appreciation for organic foods. I always thought to myself - WTF is the diff? Yea, well, taste it and you will know.

Tonight I got a little creative and thought I would share my dinner recipe:

1/2 Yellow Squash - sliced into discs, then slice again into moon shapes
2 Chicken breast cutlets - chopped into bite sized pieces
1/3 cup organic diced tomatoes
6-8 fresh chives - finely chopped
1 Sm clove garlic
Extra Virgin Olive Oil
Your favorite salt-free seasoning - I use Mrs. Dash garlic something or another
1/2 avocado - chopped into bite size pieces

Saute chicken breast pieces, yellow squash, chives, spices and garlic until chicken is fully cooked and yellow squash is cooked to your liking. I did this on med heat. Turned down to low and add the organic tomatoes, until they are heated through. Place on plate and top with avocado and enjoy!

Awesome Parental Units

Again, I have to say my p-units are pretty darn cool. They found a cool website update "side job" for me to do at night and on weekends. Now that is the bomb.

Holiday Stuff

Not much to say here, but I have to say that I am not going home for the holidays and it is going to be completely different. BUT I know that I am going to truly enjoy it here. I have a ton of friends to celebrate with, so no biggie! :)

So, my friend Lucy already put her Christmas Tree up. I know it sounds kind of nuts, but it is actually getting me into the holiday spirit! I am actually going to get a real tree this year, so I am pretty pumped up about that.

AND I totally have an awesome fireplace!! I can't wait for Santa to fill my stocking!!! I should probably get one for Paczki too, I wouldn't want to leave out my only child - even if he is a four-legged furry one!! You might think I am a little knuts by saying that, but either you are a pug person or your not. And I am, so get over it!

Alright - time to go check out some holiday decor so I can deck the walls!!!

Something Fun!

I found this post on one of my friends blogs and thought it would be fun.....

Go to this site: http://www.musicoutfitters.com/

At the top in the search box, type in the year you graduated, then cut and copy the songs here.

For all the songs you liked, or even kinda liked, bold them. For songs you do not know, italicize. For songs you did not like, make them a different color.


1. (Everything I Do) I Do It For You, Bryan Adams
2. I Wanna Sex You Up, Color Me Badd
3. Gonna Make You Sweat, C+C Music Factory
4. Rush Rush, Paula Abdul
5. One More Try, Timmy T
6. Unbelievable, EMF
7. More Than Words, Extreme
8. I Like The Way (The Kissing Game), Hi-Five
9. The First Time, Surface
10. Baby, Baby, Amy Grant
11. Motownphilly, Boyz II Men (Boyz II Men, ABC, BBD....)
12. Because I Love You (The Postman Song), Stevie B
13. Someday, Mariah Carey
14. High Enough, Damn Yankees
15. From A Distance, Liette Midler
16. All The Man That I Need, Whitney Houston
17. Right Here, Right Now, Jesus Jones
18. I Adore Mi Amor, Color Me Badd
19. Love Will Never Do (Without You), Janet Jackson
20. Good Vibrations, Marky Mark and The Funky Bunch Featuring Loleatta Holloway
21. Justify My Love, Madonna
22. Emotions, Mariah Carey
23. Joyride, Roxette
24. Romantic, Karyn White
25. I Don't Wanna Cry, Mariah Carey
26. Hold You Tight, Tara Kemp
27. You're In Love, Wilson Phillips
28. Every Heartbeat, Amy Grant
29. Sensitivity, Ralph Tresvant
30. Touch Me (All Night Long), Cathy Dennis
31. I've Been Thinking About You, Londonbeat
32. Do Anything, Natural Selection
33. Losing My Religion, R.E.M.
34. Coming Out Of The Dark. Gloria Estefan
35. Here We Go. C+C Music Factory
36. It Ain't Over 'Til It's Over, Lenny Kravitz
37. Where Does My Heart Beat Now, Celine Dion
38. Summertime, D.J. Jazzy Jeff and The Fresh Prince
39. Wind Of Change, Scorpions
40. P.A.S.S.I.O.N., Rhythm Syndicate
41. The Promise Of A New Day, Paula Abdul
42. I'm Your Baby Tonight, Whitney Houston
43. Love Of A Lifetime, Firehouse
44. Fading Like A Flower (Every Time You Leave), Roxette
45. This House, Tracie Spencer
46. Hole Hearted, Extreme
47. Power Of Love-Love Power, Luther Vandross
48. Impulsive, Wilson Phillips
49. Love Is A Wonderful Thing, Michael Bolton
50. Rhythm Of My Heart, Rod Stewart
51. Things That Make You Go Hmmmm..., C+C Music Factory
52. I Touch Myself, Divinyls (Heck ya, and if you know me you KNOW this is my fav song!!)
53. Tom's Diner, DMA
54. Iesha, Another Bad Creation
55. Something To Talk About, Bonnie Raitt
56. After The Rain, Nelson
57. Play That Funky Music, Vanilla Ice
58. Temptation, Corina
59. Can't Stop This Thing We Started, Bryan Adams
60. I Can't Wait Another Minute, Hi-Five
61. 3 A.M. Eternal, The KLF
62. Time, Love and Tenderness, Michael Bolton
63. Saideness Part I, Enigrna
64. Around The Way Girl, LL Cool J (Hey LL, I'll be your round the way girl!!)
65. I'll Be There, Escape Club
66. Cream, Prince and The N.P.G. (get on top!)
67. Now That We Found Love, Heavy D. and The Boyz (Another fav!)
68. Show Me The Way, Styx
69. Love Takes Time, Mariah Carey
70. Cry For Help, Rick Astley
71. The Way You Do The Things You Do, UB40
72. Here I Am (Come and Take Me), UB40
73. Signs, Tesla
74. Too Many Walls, Cathy Dennis
75. Crazy, Seal (This is a great song!!!)
76. I'll Give All My Love To You, Keith Sweat
77. Place In This World, Michael W. Smith
78. Something To Believe In, Poison
79. Wicked Game, Chris Issak
80. Get Here, Oleta Adams
81. Round and Round, Tevin Campbell
82. Silent Lucidity, Queensryche
83. I'm Not In Love, Will To Power
84. Piece Of My Heart, Tara Kemp
85. Real Real Real, Jesus Jones
87. Just Another Dream, Cathy Dennis
88. Everybody Plays The Fool, Aaron Neville
88. Strike It Up, Black Box
89. Rico Suave, Gerardo (Seriously? Who doesn't like this song??)
90. Disappear, INXS
91. Groove Is In The Heart, Deee-Lite
92. All This Time, Sting
93. The One and Only, Chesney Hawkes
94. O.P.P., Naughty By Nature
95. Freedom 90, George Michael (yum)
96. I Saw Red, Warrent (when I opened up the door....)
97. Miles Away, Winger
98. Do You Want Me, Salt-N-Pepa
99. The Motown Song, Rod Stewart
100. Shiny Happy People, R.E.M.

Good News/Bad News

Bad news, I had a few beers last night (and salty popcorn) and I think it skewed my results from the 4 day diet! UGH! I gained 2 LBs!!

Good news, I am not sure how this happened with the above 2 LBs - BUT I did lose 3/4 inch from my midsection and 1 1/2 inches from my waist! YAY!!

So onto the eating plan....hopefully I will have some good reports next week! I actually feel really good though, and know I am understanding how much salt an alcohol play a role with my body. I think it's about time that I really do some cutbacks. I don't think I will have too much of a problem cutting back on the salt - I have found some good salt-free seasonings. The alcohol part, well, not so easy. :)

What I need to do now is figure out how many calories are in my favorite drinks, and if I am going to consume them, I have to cut back on food calories. Tit for Tat. Now THAT is going to be difficult!!

Today is going to be an ebay/craigslist day - it's time to start cleaning out some of this mess I don't need. The less I have the better, purging has never felt so good!

Which reminds me - what exactly do you do with jigsaw puzzles that you have already put together once and don't want????

We all have slip ups....

Last night I went to a party and had a few beers, no biggie. I know I probably shouldn't have indulged since it is not part of my 4 day plan, but you know what - that's life. I also ate food I shouldn't have last night either - but again, that's life. I am not going to sit here and feel bad about it, or stop my "diet" by any means. I woke up today and wanted to get right back on track, and that is what is important to me.

Today is going to be great. I have some reading to do, beads to sort, an office to clean, and a checkbook to balance. Oh, and food to eat. :) My favorite part of the day.

I also have some planning to do to - as it turns out, my "interim" job is not going to last as long as I had planned. But, it's ok, because I knew I was not going to do this forever and I am still in life's limbo. This spring I am going to take the opportunity to travel a bit and visit with friends and family. That will be an adventure in itself!

Day 2 - minus 1

Yea, that's right 1 big ole LB of bloat gone! Although, it might be back already - with all the water I drank today - wow!! But no salt for two days and I think I am having withdrawal symptoms!! After this 4 day thing, I might reward myself with a pringle or something.

I have only eaten 1200 calories a day for two days - its completely weird, and I am actually kind of hungry. It is split up into 4 meals a day, so at least I am never STARVING as usual. Just think - in two more days I can have 1600 calories! YAY! Oh yea, and I get to eat avacados - YUM!!! I seriously hope that is one of my meals - I would eat them every day if I could!

Another workout with The Bean Nazi today, this time I did the Pilates workout instead of the Ab workout and also did the Full Body Workout. Not too bad now that I am done, but the push-ups? I thought the lady was trying to make me pass out! Seriously, when your only workout for a year has been 12oz curls - it's hard to get used to pushing up your big ole body!!

But I'm stickin with it, my commitment-phobia is starting to disappate and I figured it can only get better from here!!

Powerwashing my insides - Day 1

This mornings breakfast was good - cornflake, unsweetened applesauce (which I promptly seasoned with Pampered Chef Cinnamon Plus Blend - YUM!!), raw sunflower seeds, and what I am now calling the "magic potion". I am still working on the sunflower seeds, I am not really hungry but I figured I better follow this thing right.

The magic potion is really not bad, in fact, it tastes like lemonade. Not the stuff you get in a restaurant that is too sweet to drink, but the home made kind that is more like lemon water. Since I drink water all day and even bring a glass to bed with me, it is really not that big of a deal to drink this stuff.

So I guess that's it. Hopefully lunch will not completely make me ill, I am supposed to eat a pint of grape tomatoes along with 4 oz of turkey and a piece of string cheese! I think that is overdoing it on the tomatoes, so I am going to eat as many as I can. Seriously, a pint? You see why I call this thing powerwashing???

Salt.....I just can't quit you!!

Starting tomorrow I am going on a 4 day "anti-bloat" diet. Yea. Sounds fun, doesn't it? Well, I have found a great "fad diet" that I am going to try out. I am not going to tell you what it is until it actually works. No sense in endorsing something without trying it first!!

Anyway, in preparation this evening I made myself a nice large bowl of buttery popcorn with Parmesan cheese. Yum-Yum. This has to be one of my all time favorite snacks. It's too bad I always take a healthy snack and turn it into a salt and butter infested fat mess. Hey, what can I say - I LOVE SALTY FOODS!!!! I love cheese, I love butter, I love salt, and I LOOOVE popcorn.

Tomorrow morning I start out with cornflakes and applesauce. Doesn't sound too bad if you ask me! This "cleansing" consists of a lot of fruits and veggies, and some cereal worked in. It actually does not sound bad. Well, except for, of course, this crazy drink I have to drink....see there is always a catch. It really doesn't sound bad either, it's not any kind of chemical or packet - it's actually water with some fruits and veggies that soak overnight. I made it tonight and it actually smells kind of good, so here's hoping for a great start for this 4 day thing.

Oh, and I am supposed to keep a journal, so I guess it will be this blog. I am not going to declare any weights or measurements on here though, so don't get yourself all excited. I will only talk about lost inches or lbs or pants actually fitting properly. My jeans are starting to look like my nightmare trip to Old Navy last summer!!

Off to bed, the pug is eyeing me again and it's starting to creep me out. Later.

Miss me?

Yea, yea, yea. You don't want to hear what movie star I compare myself to, you want to hear about the trials and tribulations of my reduced income status!

So, what does a broke 35 year old girl do when she's bored? I said, broke - so none of that getting drunk stuff. Although that sounds kind of fun right now.

Well, I bought this workout thing last year after seeing it on TV. Yes, I am a sucker. BUT, I bought this thing called The Bean for like $50. It's like a pilates ball, but in the shape of a bean. When I first bought it, I was super excited and pulled it out of the box and pumped it up (comes with a handy foot pump). Well..... it just sat there, and sat there, and sat there. So, I finally deflated it and packed it away.

Something inspired me to get that thing out - yea that would be the fact that I FINALLY have a connector for my DVD player to my TV, thank you very much! I popped in the DVD and did the 7 minute AB workout and thought, "Hey this isn't that bad!" So I decided to try the 30 minute Total Body Blast, what's 23 more minutes? By about 3/4 the way through I was swearing at that dumb be-atch instructor, telling her "Shut up, you f'n bean nazi!!"

But wouldn't you know it, 3 days later I did it again - that is twice in one week!! AND I walked 2.26 miles on Sunday! WOW! My body has no idea what to do. So it's been eating really healthy and craving water like mad. Hm. Weird side effects if you ask me.

I am telling you, I am going to ENJOY stuffing my face this holiday season and not feel guilty! There are pies to be eaten, cookies to bake, and my friend Lucy's stuffing that I haven't stopped thinking about since last Thanksgiving!! It is even better than my mom's!! Oh sh*t, sorry Mom!!

Anyhow, I am still working from home these days and it's been pretty uneventful. Trust me, I am COMPLETELY welcoming it!!

Now if only I could cure my procrastination...I guess I will think about that tomorrow.

I'm a .......

Your result for Are You a Jackie or a Marilyn? Or Someone Else? Mad Men-era Female Icon Quiz...

You Are a Katharine!

You are a Katharine -- "I am happy and open to new things"

Katharines are energetic, lively, and optimistic. They want to contribute to the world.

How to Get Along with Me

• * Give me companionship, affection, and freedom.
• * Engage with me in stimulating conversation and laughter.
• * Appreciate my grand visions and listen to my stories.
• * Don't try to change my style. Accept me the way I am.
• * Be responsible for youself. I dislike clingy or needy people.
• * Don't tell me what to do.

What I Like About Being a Katharine

• * being optimistic and not letting life's troubles get me down
• * being spontaneous and free-spirited
• * being outspoken and outrageous. It's part of the fun.
• * being generous and trying to make the world a better place
• * having the guts to take risks and to try exciting adventures
• * having such varied interests and abilities

What's Hard About Being a Katharine

• * not having enough time to do all the things I want
• * not completing things I start
• * not being able to profit from the benefits that come from specializing; not making a commitment to a career
• * having a tendency to be ungrounded; getting lost in plans or fantasies
• * feeling confined when I'm in a one-to-one relationship

Katharines as Children Often

• * are action oriented and adventuresome
• * drum up excitement
• * prefer being with other children to being alone
• * finesse their way around adults
• * dream of the freedom they'll have when they grow up

Katharines as Parents

• * are often enthusiastic and generous
• * want their children to be exposed to many adventures in life
• * may be too busy with their own activities to be attentive

Let's just F'NC about that!!

Some people have local watering holes - some people have clubhouses. Last night we had our first official TGIF at our new clubhouse!! It is a really cool space downtown in a building one of our friends owns. It's a gathering place. A place to get away. A place to hang out with your friends and have fun. It's just a really cool place.

The walls were grafitti ridden with somewhat pornographic themes on white walls. Uck. So, after a trip to Restore, a group of us changed the look of a dismal loft into a colorful inviting space!!

Here are the before pics:

And here is after one night of friends, creativity, and yes, of course....beer. :)

I will post more pics as we update the walls with some funky stuff, of course.

We met a few really cool people while we were up there, we share a floor with a couple of artists. Brian was kind enough to make us a little 'logo' for our door that says:

FNC - Friday Night Club

And he also let Jack (my friend Joey's son) add to his piece of art that he has been working on for 4 months. He asked Jack to write a story on it.

Isn't that the coolest thing you have ever seen? I love it!!

Time to head back to the loft and do some sprucing up! And maybe I will post more pics tomorrow...we'll just have to FNC.

Road trippin and random blabber

This weekend I went on a little, ok LONG, road trip to Chicago 'burbs with my friend Lucy. The both of us had different destinations, but driving together saved some money and little sanity. And provided some pretty good humor along the way.

I had a great time over the weekend visiting with a group of friends I hadn't seen in a while. It was just one of those overall I-am-so-excited-to-see-you-so-lets-get-drunk-oh-wait-you-can't-your-pregnant-ok-the-rest-of-us-will weekend!! Good times, good times. I even managed to conjure up a "photo shoot" with my girlfriends to practice my skills. I will never look at a banana the same way again!!! (You totally had to be there to get that)

And now for the random blabber.....

If you haven't played 'keep away' with a pug - I highly recommend it. Dogs can be so entertaining, I seriously don't know why everyone doesn't have one.

Do you really know what Sweetest Day is? Ever since I found out May Day is some kind of pagan holiday, I am in the habit of looking up the TRUE meanings of these days. So, Sweetest Day is actually a candy manufactured holiday - not a 'hallmark' holiday. But, Hallmark has indeed made a huge mark on getting the holiday put on calendars. Of course, as we all know, there is a card for EVERY occasion. I have come up with a few manufactured holidays and card greetings I think need to be added to the list:

Bowel Movement Day - "Congrats on taking that dump - you've been constipated way too long and I am tired of hearing about it."

Toe Nail Clipping Day - "You finally cut those talons, yah!"

Dog Bath Day - "Well, it's about time!! Your dog smelled like shit!"

Run Out of Gas Day - "Sorry to hear you are having trouble keeping up with the high cost of gas. Oh, your company pays for your gas? Nevermind. I will take back the $50 I was going to put in this card."

Made it to Work on Time Day - "You lazy piece of shit, now it wasn't that hard, was it?"

Perfect Day at Work Day - "Glad to hear you finally quit that miserable job!!"

Hangover Day - "At this rate, I ought to buy you stock in Hallmark. What, is this the fourteenth card I bought you this month? And it's only the 13th, you brutal sot!!"

If you think of any fun days that need holidays, let me know and I will come up with a snazzy card and add it to the list!

Have a great sweetest day, and remember to buy your friends lots of candy - especially those on diets.

It's not me, it's you....

Ok, it is me. I know it's been WAY too long since I have posted, but I took some time out to enjoy my birthday weekend.

Not to mention my friends are keeping me busy with a social life..... what a life!!

Anyway, I am still working from home and I am really starting to get into this. I actually worked an extra hour today. The fact that my boss is in another state, not to mention - pretty cool, is making this job easy to stick to. I have learned a new term from my friend Joey that I thought was hilarious.

PICNIC - Problem In Chair, Not In Computer

So, I have several picnics a day...lol.

Things are starting to come together financially. Well, as much as they can anyway. I have not found a roommate yet, but decided against posting any type of ad on craigslist. Apparently there is some kind of FREAK roaming the streets here breaking into homes of women who live alone. I am not going to go into details, but let's just say putting that ad out is like an open invite.

So, no roommate - no school. UGH. Classes don't start until Dec 1st, so I suppose I do have some time to get this figured out. All the scholarships I have found require you to be enrolled, so I will have to do that to start all those fun applications. There are a lot of cool ones out there amongst the riffraff that I don't qualify for.

Another added bonus is that I now have a new desktop (yea!) courtesy of my friend John, and now I am just looking for a flat screen monitor. I can now get back to normal business with my photoshop, publisher, and getting to my side projects!!! I can't wait to ditch this old piece that is taking up space in here!!

Have a great weekend, I am heading to Chicago for the weekend for a baby shower. I am very excited to go on a road trip AND to see some friends and family while I am at it!!

Officially Official

YEA! I passed my road and written test, I am now officially a Nebraskan. Or what you people like to call Cornhuskers!! LMAO. $439 later, I now have a NE drivers license, plates and title. The best part is my new license plate number, it couldn't have been any better if I picked it myself:

RBL 703

Yup...I am a rebel born in 1973....how's that for karma?? Good thing the numbers don't add up to 23. That would kind of freak me out.

I also have switched my affixing medium to electrical tape for the mirror on my car. It's much less obvious and doesn't leave that annoying residue. Yea, it's cracked and it looks pretty ghetto, but I am still waiting on a return phone call from my insurance company. I tell ya, if I have to drive a mini-van for my rental vehicle, I most certainly will throw a tantrum. Last time it was a blue astro-something-or-other and I felt like the biggest tool. I was almost tempted to put my bumper sticker on it that says:

My Pug is smarter than your honor roll student.

I would fit right in with the suburbanites with that one. Hey maybe I should slap on the other one I had made because I saw a similar one (well, it was kind of opposite) and thought it was completely sexist:

My other ride is your Dad.

Yea, I know, I am twisted. But hey, isn't that why we are friends?

What is it with skin in this household?

Now it's me! UGH! I wore this necklace the other day and completely forgot that last time I wore it I broke out in a rash. So guess what, I have a nice rash-lace to complete my outfit every day. It itches like a bitch and I have been putting benedryl on it all day. Darn sensitive skin!

It's bad enough I get "redneck" when I drink....now it's there all frickin day! Gee, I hope I get called for an interveiw!! LOL. Sorry, I am not going to make in for my interview...well, you see, I've got this rash.....

Tomorrow I have to go to the DMV and take a stupid driving test. Seriously. I hope I don't F it up too bad, I have never had to do a road test before. Well, besides when I was 16 and I really don't consider the teaching I had from ABC Driving school (or whatever it was called) any kind of test. That guy should have never let me have my license - but he did and now look. I am going to be 35 and I have no idea what the heck I am doing taking a road test. I can't even take my own car because I don't have a drivers side mirror! I need some good karma sent my way.......PLEASE!!

Oh yea, not to mention license plates here are seriously the biggest rip off I have ever heard of. $450 for a piece of metal and a sticker? I wonder if I can make payments on that? I am just so irritated that I have to throw down that kind of money. Especially when I make part time wages and have not a cent to my name!!

Oh yea, that was by choice. ;)

I love Saturdays!!

Now that I don't have to work them! It is so nice to wake up in the morning and start working on chores in the house. Yes, you heard me right - it is nice doing chores! Considering it takes me literally 2 days to clean this place, a few hours on a Sat morning really gets me caught up. Try vaccuming and mopping 1800 square feet and you will know what I mean!

This week has been quite eventful. Monday night, someone hit my car at some point during the night and knocked my drivers side mirror off. THANK GOODNESS she actually left a note with her name and number! WOW! Now that is some midwestern hospitality for ya! So I tried duct taping it - as you all know I am a HUGE fan of duct tape (haha) and needless to say it makes me feel a little at home. Anyone who knows the gas cap story is probably laughing. Well, it doesn't quite work that great, so I literally have to drive with my window down and holding my mirror in place. It's actually quite comical.

My dog has come down with some kind of skin allergy, which I can't figure out where it came from this time. Last time it was his food, but that hasn't changed recently so the only thing I can figure is maybe something in the back yard. So I am now back to adding fish oil omega-3 to his diet. I probably should just do this all the time. If you have an itchy dog with dry skin, you should try it. It nourishes the skin from the inside out and really makes for some soft fur. And if your dog is like mine, he will love it on his food!!

Let's see....what else this week. Oh. I backed up my kitchen sink again and of course don't listen or learn from the last time. It's the garbage disposal. Did you know you shouldn't put pasta and starchy foods in there? Hm. Wish I had known that before I dumped some leftover rice noodles in there. Oops! So I probably shouldn't have put the spinach dip in there either - the leaves get stuck to the sides of the pipes apparently. As I am reading on the internet what is not good for a garbage disposal, it makes me wonder....what can you put in there? So, after the plumber comes and fixes it, again, I am pretty much going to leave that thing alone. No food for you!

Oh, I forgot to mention the pretty much assenine thing I did while trying to fix the sink myself. I had rubber gloves on and here I am trying to use the black cap thing that blocks up the sink as a plunger. Bad idea, folks!! I was plunging away and from my hands getting wet inside the gloves (from sweat of course) I managed to scrape a pretty large piece of skin back on my middle finger. Now that hurt like a bitch. I rinsed off my hands and managed to put the skin flap back and put on some Neosporin type stuff and bandaged it up with some gauze and first aid tape. (Yea, it was gross) Needless to say, that made it pretty difficult to type this week.

Now that bandaids have become my friend, I can get back to the real world of writing, ebaying, craigslisting, resume writing, or whatever side jobs come my way. Speaking of side jobs, my landlord is reducing my rent $50 a month in exchange for cleaning the hallway and changing light bulbs. Yup, I am now a janitor too!! See, I can do anything!

PS. Some of you ladies back home should appreciate this.....the RED is back!! :)

I can't think of a snappy title

So, week one of working from home is complete! It is kind of boring to sit at a desk all day, even though I am in the comfort of my own home. But, I actually kind of enjoy the brainless work right now.

I am officially looking for a roommate since I have no idea if or when I am going to find a full time job. I might just decide to work from home long term - who knows. But one thing I do know is that I HAVE to get my ass enrolled in school if I want to do this. So, in order to afford it I am going to have to bite the bullet and get a roomie.

I must admit I am probably not the easiest person to live with, I am kind of a neat freak and have a pug that sheds pretty much every minute. This should be interesting to say the least. I just hope I can find someone soon and that has the same living habits. Well, at least picks up after themselves!!

I am pretty wiped out from being in the sun yesterday and cleaning all day today..... stay tuned for more updates!!

Sideways...

No, not the movie (which I love very much) but me! I pulled another muscle in my back at some point over the weekend and have been walking sideways for 2 days. This explains why I have not posted...plus my computer is SOOOO darn slow, I hate getting on it. My back is much better today, I took a muscle relaxer Sunday and 2 Aleve last night along with some Nuprin muscle rub (that is GREAT stuff!) and had a good night's rest!

So the work at home job went ok the first day and better today. I felt like I wasn't much help yesterday, but I am thinking it was because I was in so much pain. Likely story. Ha. It's good to have some type of income, but I am still searching for something I can do that will be rewarding to me personally.

I will say though, working in your pajamas and slippers is actually kind of cool!

What can Brown do for you?

Apparently not much. I have been sitting around all day waiting for the UPS man to deliver my new PC for the PT gig. Instead of sitting around and looking out the window, I decided to be productive.

I cleaned out my office/studio for several hours. I have been attempting to do this for months, but just have not had the time. See, being unemployed does have its benefits! It looks really good in here and even feels like a clean and productive working environment. I still have the dreaded filing cabinet to conquer, but that beast says wait until after lunch.

As I was typing, Brown shows up with a package which I know is TOO small for a pc. Darn it. I waited all day for a new hire packet. What a buzzkill.

It's time for lunch then onto the rest of the office. I may even hang my new poster of Audrey Hepburn from Breakfast at Tiffany's just to make this room complete.

Nothing like a little afternoon of daydreaming to complete my new home office/studio!

What's up Homey?

A little celebration is in order, I now have an interim job that starts on Monday! And get this, I am able to work from home! Yes, you heard me, from home!

You know that saying, be careful what you wish for? Well, this was one of those ideas that I had which I really didn't think they would go for. However, since they need the help and I need a job it all kind of worked out. I will be working part time, 30-35 hours per week and I also am able to take time off for interviews and such! I just need to let them know when. They are also sending me a new computer and will be paying for my additional cell phone charges.

The great thing is, they have enough work for me until at least January. So, I have plenty of time to figure out what my future holds. Who knows, maybe I will end up working in more of a long term capacity and find something locally to supplement the other part of my salary. OR maybe the roommate lead I have will pan out. Either or is fine with me.

Now I should probably tell you why. I haven't said much about this yet, but the non-profit I have mentioned in prior posts is now turning into a for-profit with a foundation. We recieved some insight from our resident non-profit guru which has really helped us understand what we need to do. (Thank you!!)

What does this mean? Well, it means that since I am working part time (did I mention it's from home?) I will have the time to build this business with my friends and help make something that was once a dream into a living, breathing reality. Oh, have I mentioned that I get to be the Art Director? :) See, the dream of one has turned into a dream of two, then three, then four. We all have our different reasons, but we also have the same vision of what this business will accomplish. And what is that, you may ask? Well........

Just like any series of mystery books, cliffhangers always keep you coming back.

Random Updates

Just to keep you in the loop on my progress of finding work I love, I figured I would give a little progress report in the form of random updates.

In the last week I have......

• Called my creditors alarming them of my unemployment status - surprisingly that went fairly well
• Painted an original water color for a silent auction, which is now with the framer - yea!
• Created a program for a fundraiser
• Started a budget for a startup company
• Worked on a special little project for my 'absolutely fabulous' girlfriends back home
• Cleaned my friends kitchen (including scrubbing the countertops and cupboards) to help prepare for her family coming to town
• Did about 5 loads of laundry
• Cleaned out my refridgerator and freezer
• Went out to lunch with a recruiter, setup a potential interview
• Worked on my resume

But one thing I have NOT done is work on my book!! So, tomorrow morning after I take care of a few "real career" to-dos, I am on to finish chapter 1. It is just sitting there waiting for me and I have been ignoring that lovely creature!! Trust me, it's not for a lack of content. I have a wild imagination just waiting to be spewed out in the form of a book! Too bad I don't have "wonder twin" powers, or I would just yell:

"ACTIVATE!!"

My mind is racing...but who wins?

Today it's been officially a week since I have been unemployed. When you are not working, you have more than enough time to think. Sometimes it is thinking about your next job and how great it is going to be. Sometimes you think about what time you need to get up in the morning and remember you don't have a job. Sometimes you think of weird ways to come up with money. Sometimes you think of the most random thing and all of a sudden you are a philosopher. With all my random thoughts, I could be the next Socrates or Plato.

My mind has been racing today with all sorts of ideas. One of the ideas I have keeps popping up in my mind like a recurring zit.

Let's think about this for a minute. How many times have you heard this question:

"Will you do me a huge favor?"

I've asked it a zillion times, I have heard it a zillion times. Now, what if there was a little bit of incentive for that favor? Would you be more inclined to do the favor? Or think of this, how much would you pay for that favor to be completed by someone else? Really, how much is that favor worth?

If I said back to you, "Sure, for twenty bucks, I'll do you a favor," would you be willing to fork over a Jackson for it? You laugh now, but if I did 8 favors a day for a week (M-F of course) I would have $800. Doesn't sound like a bad deal to me. Anyone have any favors for me?

Parentals are the bomb

I just wanted to say THANK YOU to my P-units for donating this month's grocery and gas money. (Hey, I am not too proud for handouts!) What a great way to start the weekend!

I only use about a tank of gas a month living here, so I filled up my car to the rim while I have the money in my hand. I know all you Motor City folks are probably flipping me off about now since I know many of you fill up several times per month. Just think, when I lived there I was spending about $300 a month and that was a year ago!

Which reminds me, I was going through my budget this morning and realized that in the last year I have cut my monthly living expenses down by $1400. Most of that is the housing expense, which absolutely kills me. That bank should have never approved that mortgage!! Now before you start wondering why I don't have any money, I must mention that I do not make as much as I did back home. Yes, along with joining the circus, I took a massive pay cut with a promise of a fairly large bonus which I cannot collect on now. See, I told you I wasn't any good at gambling!!

So, tonight I am going to open the $3.99 bottle of wine I found in the clearance bin, cook myself dinner, work on the painting, and watch Titanic so I can bawl my eyes out. I love my ME dates!!

One decision down.....

Where are you going to live? Well, I am staying put right here. At least for the time being anyway. I do not want to start over again yet. I feel like I just got here anyhow. And now that I don't have to work Saturdays (yea, part of the ol' circus gig) I can actually explore the place!!

I also wanted to "brag" a little, cause who gets a chance to do that very often? My very best friend back home is having a fundraiser for her boyfriend who has Hodgkins Lymphoma in a few weeks. I asked if she would accept an original painting by "yours truly" for the silent auction. I guess I don't have to tell you that she said yes, or else why would I bring it up, right? Anyway, I am very excited about this, my first painting in a silent auction and the proceeds will be going to a great guy!! Not to mention one of my friends here in Omaha asked if he could donate the framing cost - how cool is that?

People just never cease to amaze me these days!

A Piece of Mind for Peace of Mind

This morning I wrote an email to the recruiting company that placed me at the circus. Although giving a little piece of my mind is not going to change things, maybe I can prevent someone else from getting into the same situation I was in. What a do-gooder I am!

I guess the saying is true in many more aspects of life than I had initially thought:

"If you can't be a good example, then you'll just have to serve as a horrible warning." ~Unknown

It will be interesting to see how long it takes for them to get back with me, or if they even do. It really doesn't matter too much, but as long as I was able to warn them - I have done my job.

Speaking of jobs, I have another cool lead on a job that I am pretty excited about. I will know more next week and will let you know when the interview is confirmed. The great thing about the job and company is that it is nationwide. So, if I do decide to move to another state, I have the option of transferring instead of trying to find another job again. You just never know where life may take you.... :)

What are you going to do now?

This, my friends, is the question of the week. It's such an intense topic, it has to have it's own post. If I had a dollar for every time I have heard this question this week, I might have enough money to pay next months rent!!

The short answer: I don't know yet

But I do know one thing I am going to do, and that is stay AWAY from the industry I was in. Far, far away. I have been bombarded with suggestions, questions, directions, and even a few should-do's in the last few days. It is all a bit overwhelming to say the least. I do appreciate all the concern, but really, I need to make some choices here and I am not rushing into anything unless I feel right about it. I made this move on a whim and look where it got me. I was miserable. I moved halfway across the country to work for the circus - who knew?

Choices, choices. Stay here, move back to MI, move to FL with my parentals, move to NC to be near my sis and friends, and really just start over (again) somewhere else. This is not something you can just decide in two days or really even a week. I don't want to be pressured into making a decision, although I do like hearing the different options.

Reality says that I may have to put off art school for a bit, which really bites, but I think I need to get rid of my debt and generate some savings first. Who knows, maybe a miracle will land in my lap when I least expect it.

I think it's about that time where I outline all my options (the ones I have so far) and write down the ol' pro and con list. Now that is one thing I KNOW I am good at!

No job, no worries

I am officially unemployed, but for some reason I am not too worried about it - for now. The stress of working at the circus was more than the stress of figuring out what I am going to do about a job and my life.

By the way, I must fill you in on the Loon's last act. He actually had one of my employees call me on Monday night (after my awesome vacation) to tell me that he has decided to terminate me. He even changed the locks on the building!! What a coward!! He couldn't even tell me to my face, let alone do it himself!! Then has the balls to tell my employee that it is up to him whether or not he wants me to come in and train for a week. What? Yea. Dude - you fired me, why would I come in and train? Are you kidding me? No, it's not up to him - it's up to me. NO WAY. If Loon thinks he is that smart then he can figure it out himself.

If that shows you any clue as to what I had been dealing with...you will get why it was time to go.

Anyway, onto a more positive topic....

I have been really busy the last two days. You would think that without a job I would be "at home all day." Well, at least that is what some people think I am doing. No, I am not just sitting here. I get up between 7 and 7:30 and make my coffee, work on my list of things I need to do for the day, take a shower, make phone calls, surf the internet, run errands, take incoming phone calls, and I even have been helping a friend clean her house in exchange for meals.

My friends have been awesome too. I cannot thank them enough for checking in to make sure I am fed and not sitting on my butt feeling sorry for myself. I don't feel sorry for myself, I am so relieved not to have to step foot in the circus, that I just can't fit whining about it into my day!

I wonder if this is what it's like working for yourself? You have your own schedule, you tell yourself what to do, and wow - you actually can take a vacation when it is convenient for you! Hmmmm.... doesn't sound that bad to me. Yes, I do realize that there is a lot of work involved, trust me, I have a few friends that work for themselves and I know how hard they work!! But I can imagine that it's much more fulfilling to work for yourself than to work for someone who does not appreciate you and your efforts.

I would rather work for a "one man band" than a circus full of clowns anyday!

Vacations ROCK!

Today is my last day of vacation and I have had a great time! I am going to be heading home this afternoon, and even though my vacation is over - I am looking forward to wrapping things up at the circus.

I suppose I should put my "official" notice in tomorrow, then onto some intense training for the clowns that will have to keep up the big top going. My advice to them is this:

Someday you will have your epiphany too.

This week I will be looking into a few books that one of my friends suggested I read. One is called '48 days to the Work You Love' and other is called 'Total Money Makeover'. Sounds to me these are right up my alley these days. I also have a lot of phone calls to make too so I can get rid of all this ugly debt and get to a point where I am going to feel comfortable making less money. I am such a bargain budget girl anyway, so I don't think that I am going to feel much of a change. Well, maybe at first.....

As I reflect on this past year of my life, I have been taught some valuable lessons. I thought I would share them:

• There is no bond greater than a friendship
• Do or do not, there is no try. (ok, this is a quote from Yoda - but I love it!)
• You can do things you never thought you would: Bull-riding, wake-boarding, be one of the first to jump into a COLD river for the season.... :)
• Your family is not just composed of your relatives
• Life is too short to sit around and watch it happen
• LIVE OUT LOUD!!!!

Have a great Labor Day and stay tuned for more of my adventures!

I did it!

Today was the day. It wasn't planned, it just happened. I told the loon I think he should find someone else.

I am not going to go into gory details, because quite frankly it's just not worth it. But I will say that today was the last day of being talked down to, treated like a child, blamed for all wrong-doing, lied to, disrespected, and last but not least, made to be felt like a failure.

Wow - does it feel good!! No, I don't have a job, but I don't care. Any human with any ounce of respect for themselves and their sanity would have done the same thing.

So. Now again I will say: I am going on vacation tomorrow and I am going to have a great time!!!

Is insanity a true defense?

In my book it is. I am claiming I must have been insane taking this job in the first place. This morning I opened up a book that my friend Tom wrote. I bought it a few months ago at his book opening party at one of our local hot spots. He even signed the inside jacket for me. Anyway, as I am reading it, this sentance just popped out and hit me in the head:

"Insanity is defined as doing the same thing repeatedly and expecting different results."

~Tom Becka

I have often wondered how I could have known that this place would turn out to be just a big circus with the ring leader being a giant loon? Now I am thinking, how could I have NOT known? It's the same industry, same hot-headed owner-type, and the same complaining or tattletale employees. (Ok, not all of them are, but I am just saying....) Why would this job end up any different than the last? I used to think that it might just be me, I didn't try hard enough, my heart wasn't in it, or I just wasn't cut out for this type of job.

That is truly not the case. The only thing I did wrong here is that I put too much faith in the same scenario thinking it would produce exceptional results. Instead, it proved to be much worse than the first go around.

Now I look at it this way: It's time to say goodbye to the bearded lady, the mole, the muppet, and last but not least, the loon. What is that saying about looking back at the past, but not staring? It's pretty hard not to when it's the circus, because believe me they know how to capture an audience. They just don't know how to keep them watching.

Me and my sanity are packing our bags and going on vacation tomorrow. 5 days without the circus will be a great preview to the next chapter of my life - and my book!

My mind is buzzing...

I have so much positive energy going right now!! I just got home from the second official meeting for the non-profit startup I am involved in. All things start from a great idea, and my friend Joey has an awesome one. I will fill you in on the details later, but I think this is going to be one of the life altering experiences that I will forever be thankful for.

I may just have a great opportunity ahead of me too on the part time gig. My old boss was more than happy to hear from me, and I think this might just be exactly what I am looking for. I can work part time, go to school, AND be involved in the non-profit. Now THAT is what I am talkin about!!

New life, here I come!!!

Back on track

Today I checked a few things off my list of to-do's for my new adventure. I emailed my landlord to make sure it is ok that I get a roommate without having to redo the lease, and I also emailed my old boss from the software company I used to work for to see if I could work part-time from home. Hey, it's a long shot, but doesn't hurt to ask!

I figured I could work as an independant contractor for 15-20 hours per week, of course at a rate that would cover all my major expenses. Then I can go to school full time and also live where ever my little heart decides to go. For now, I am going to sit tight right here, but you never know what opportunities may come up elsewhere. I am going to start classes at the local community college, but I am thinking in a few years I will transfer to a larger university. Hey, if you are going to do something like this, you better do it all the way!!

So, I am looking for suggestions on schools that have good art programs. Actually, GREAT art programs would be more like it. I have done some research, but I have found that many recommendations are better by word of mouth.

Wish me luck. If this doesn't pan out, that's ok, I am still planning on reworking some of my finances so I can apply for the museum job. Whatever it takes, I will be out of that Circus soon!!

Hello?? Anybody reading this?

Tonight was "resume" night for me. For some reason, I am having a tough time writing up my job description. Writers block on a resume, now that is odd for me. Ever since I had my resume professionally written and recieved some great tips several years ago, I have been able to write up a pretty impressive resume. I have even written some for friends or helped tweak them a bit.

I am pretty sure I know what it is though. It's the circus. How can I write something professional about that place? Wow. Let's see... I am a babysitter to several adult children, I have to watch what I say so "the mole" doesn't hear me, and I never know what direction The Loon is going to spin me on an hour by hour basis. Not to mention, along with the title of Director, I somehow have landed the much intriguing title of "Office Manager". Seriously.

I have to send out emails to everyone about taking their garbage out, no personal phone calls, don't take too long of breaks, no texting, clean out the fridge, wipe your butt, etc. I think you get the picture. Last time I checked - these things have NOTHING to do with Accounting. Not to mention I am sending these things out to grown adults. Ok, let me rethink that. These people are the biggest babies I have ever met in my entire life. I should bring in diapers and similac tomorrow. Better yet, I am going to bring some Zweiback crackers to our next food day.

If anyone has any tips for resume writers block, post them on a comment, I would be very greatful for any kind of tips! (Yes, even the witty sarcastic ones I know your just waiting to give me)

Oh yea, and about the title...... I added some Google Analytics for my Adsense, so I know how many visitors I get. :) Which reminds me, if anyone knows how to add a subscribe by email feature - I need some help with that too.

Why you should not go shopping with me...

And especially not for jeans. (I am sure my sister can attest to this)

So, I go to Old Navy with a friend of mine today - because they have jeans on sale for $12.99 today. I normally do not shop at Old Navy, in fact I can't stand it there. But one of my friends had been blogging about all this great stuff she bought there, so I thought I would check it out.

I walk in and immediately recognize that the clothes the carry have hardly changed since they opened their doors. When was that - 90 something? Same button down tops I wore in 99, same khakis, and seriously - same cheap quality. I wonder if they still carry those scarfs I used to wear? I am pretty sure Pinky Tuscadero was my nickname for a while there.

Anyway, I decide to scoot on over to the clearance rack, my little world of bargains, and start browsing around. I find some bathing suits - I am in desperate need of a new one - and find a super cute top that us well-endowed women can actually pull off. I was excited and started looking for bottoms that would at least blend with the top. We all know that when suits are sold separately, you have to get a little creative. Nothing. No Large bottoms. What is this? You think Barbie has this much trouble? No, because she has boobs, a small waist, and practically no ass. She would have had a field day on that rack.

Pouting, I go over to the clearance clothes to see what oddball top I can find that I will actually wear more than once. After dodging a few screaming kids, I actually ended up finding several cute tops and thought to myself, "Hey, maybe it's not so bad here." Then I headed over to the jeans.

The jeans section gives you three choices, similar to the three bears story: High waisted, low waisted and mid-rise. I figure I better stick with the mid-rise these days, I think I am getting a little too old for the low-rise. For the life of me, I cannot find a size 10 anywhere. Oh, except for the gray pair. I haven't worn colored jeans since the 80s, and I don't plan to anytime soon. So, my friend that was with me convinced me just to try on the low-waisted, "They're really not that low," she says. Ok, I figured I would give it the old college try.

Into the dressing room I venture, where some zit-faced kid with a headset shows me to a room. I think he even called me ma'am. Ugh. I hang up the shirts and go for the jeans first, might as well get those out of the way. After struggling to get them up my thighs, I get them buttoned and turn around. EEEWWWW!!! My ass looks like it was disfigured in a bad sledding accident, the back of the jeans gaped enough to hold a 2 liter, and my gut hung over like a plumber. To make matters worse, I am peeling off the jeans and hear the following in 2 different high-pitched whiney voices: "These are a 2, look how big they are!" and "I don't think they have a size 0 in these!". Seriously? Did I really need to hear that?

Lesson learned. I think I will stick to buying my DKNY Soho jeans on ebay in the privacy of my own home. I don't care if they make my ass the size of Texas, at least they look proportionate and the waist hits my gut in all the right places. My advice to any woman size 10 and over: STEER CLEAR of that place, it's not good for morale.

However, amidst the tragedy of the "Old Navy shopping experience", I did end up with 4 tank tops and a cute dog toy for 30 bucks.

Thank you!!

I just have to say, I have some outstanding friends!! I have never felt such awesome encouragement and support as I have in the last few months.

I am going to re-work my resume this weekend and send it in to the museum. With all the suggestions I have recieved in the past few days, I think there may be a way to pull this off. Not to mention there is yet another job posting there, and I could do either of them with my hands tied behind my back. Plus, you never know what may come up there in the next few months.

I am not naming names, because you ladies know who you are - not to mention, don't you want to wait for the book dedication?

BUT, here is a

HUGE THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!

Good News/Bad News

Is it good news comes first or bad news? I can't remember which way, but the good news is I found a really cool job I would love to apply for (it is at the local art museum) .....BUT (there is always a but) the salary is less than half of what I make now. Hm. Thinking, thinking, how could I pull that off?

I would have to get 2 roommates instead of 1...... or I could take up one of the few offers from some of my AWESOME friends who have said I could live with them. :)

See, here is the major obstacle I need to hurdle in this whole mess. I am pretty much a statistic when it comes to credit card debt. I pay a hefty amount each month on a payment program (which I have been doing for 3 yrs now) and that raises my monthly expenses quite a bit. If it were not for that "little" issue, I am thinking the salary wouldn't be that bad.

I am wondering if I write a letter to my credit card companies and tell them my plans they would dismiss my balances.....yea, probably not. But seriously, I think it would be funny if I tried that!! Who does that?

To Whom It May Concern:

I would like for you to dismiss my balance with you because I am about to cut my salary in half and go back to art school. It really would be like donating to the arts, it could even be a tax write off if you knew a creative accountant. Not to mention I have probably sold all the stuff I bought with your credit card on ebay anyway, so what do you think? Deal?

Seriously, could you imagine the laughter in the collections office the day they get that letter? It might even be worth it just to see what their reply would be.

Ok, calling it a night. My dog is giving me "the eye" that says he is ready for bed, and he rules my world these days.

It's a Blue Moon...

Blue Moon Tuesday, anyway. So tonight, after getting home from the circus and surfing the internet for two hours (unsuccessfully searching for a legit work-from-home job), I decided to meet a couple of my friends up at our local watering hole. As you might have guessed, Blue Moon is the special on Tuesdays. You get your first one for $4 (get to keep the glass) and refills are $3. Good deals, good times. I just happened to get the last glass, ok it was a half glass, of Blue Moon - so our awesome bartender Mike informs me that our drinks are on the house, courtesy of the owner. Rock on!

Now THAT was within my budget! So I ended up using the $4 to play Keno and didn't make a dime. Last week I bet $3 and won 25 cents, so I felt lucky. But now, I am thinking being a professional gambler is out of the question. I have a horrible poker face anyway, and I think my years of cheating at Euchre in college are coming back to haunt me.

Another part of my "adventure" (as I refer to it, you may call it some kind of crisis - I say tomato you say tomaato) is going back to college for a degree in Fine Art and Photography. I have been looking into scholarships for the past few months, and I tell ya, there are scholarships for EVERYTHING! Single moms, high school students, non-traditional students, Italians, Polish, children of veterans, children of alcoholics, and I am pretty sure I saw one for children of the corn. But I certainly have not found one for "thirty-something women who have decided to give up their career in business to get an art degree to make less money". If you happen to run across such a scholarship, feel free to pass it along-I may qualify for that one!

If all else fails, there is still the dog poo job to look forward to!

Is it wrong....

To find that a job cleaning up dog poo seems more intriguing than what you are doing? I suppose it is, but the fact that I actually considered it doesn't even phase me.

I am keeping my mind open to virtually everything. It feels great to liberate yourself and realize you actually have no limitations. I have sifted through hundreds of jobs in the last two days: retail management, sales, marketing, virtual assistant, oh and yes - the lovely dog poo job.

I can't tell you how many scams I have run across in my search, now that is one thing I will not do. I am not looking to "get rich quick", I am not into pyramid companies, and NO I will not become a stripper. (Thanks for the suggestion, sis, really appreciate the compliment!)

Anyway, I actually do have to start getting ready for the circus. (I am not the bearded lady by any means, but that is the closest analogy I can come up with for my current workplace.)

Here goes nothing.....

When you got it, you got it - and when you don't??? You don't. But hey, you can't blame a girl for trying, can you?

So, I have decided to completely throw away my professional career of over 10 years and 4 years of college I am still paying for, to do something I really love to do. Well, actually, to do several things. I thought I would start out with writing, so I created this new blog. If no one reads my blog, then who is going to read my book when it's finished?

Exactly my point.

I haven't yet broke the news to my boss, which, by the way, I believe is completely insane. A lunatic, for a lack of a better word. I won't bore you with the I Hate My Boss Dialogue, because we have all heard it before. But I will say this: Next time you give advice, you might want to take it yourself. Once of my biggest pet peeves is people who complain about their jobs. One of my many motto's (yes, I have several) has been "If you don't like it, change it". So, as much as I have dished out this glorious advice, I have decided to take it. Because being your own pet peeve is kind of...well...annoying.

Trust me, I will let you know when I break the big news to the Loon - and also keep you posted on what I might be doing for a living. (Don't be surprised if you run into me at your local Pet Co.) And, since publishers don't come knocking at your door, I figured I should at least finish a few chapters before I start begging at theirs. I don't suppose a Preface counts as a chapter?