Thursday, August 27, 2009

Happy Quit-a-versary to Me!!!

Today marks the one year anniversary since I left my career and began my new life venture! I am jobless, broke, and homeless, yet I am happier now than I ever had been while I was working for that lunatic, not to mention tweedle-dee and dumb from the previous job.

I had decided that I had another calling and that I needed to figure out what that was. After I left Omaha, threw my stuff in storage, visited with my sister for 6 weeks in NC, and my interim job ran out, I found myself jobless back in Michigan. Not the ideal situation, but fortunately I am one of those people who have been blessed with family and friends with hearts of gold. Yea, I'm getting a little sappy and sentimental thinking about this whole year. Bear with me, please.

I didn't really think that it would take me a whole year to figure out what it is I wanted to do with the rest of my life, but here it is. One year later. D-day. The final countdown.....

Do I have it all figured out?

Yes, as a matter of fact, I do. I have a "master plan". The best thing about the MP is that it can be altered or changed, as it was meant to be. There will be no more working for d-bags (my new favorite word), no more reports in excel spreadsheets, no more useless meetings, no more requests for false financial statements.

I am replacing those useless tools with some new ones: spatulas, graters, cutting boards, and saute pans. Yes, folks, my new industry is my first love......FOOD!!

I will be making my way to culinary school as early as January, so I can learn every aspect of the kitchen and the food business. I am SO very excited about this culinary adventure! With a dash of business degree, a smidgen of culinary arts degree, and a sliver of entrepreneur...I will have a recipe for a fun, foodie-filled future!

Off to celebrate my one year anniversary and the beginning of a new adventure with a glass of wine.......

Oh! And before I forget...THANK YOU to all of you who have been a HUGE support to me this past year, you know who you are, and I couldn't have done this without you. :)

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Henry and Ricardo, Pilots of Customer Service

I finally recieved an email back from the Ranting for Miles letter I sent off to the NWA Rewards Network Dining for Miles program. To my displeasure, the response from "Ricardo" was less than stellar and clearly he did not read my email. Or maybe he did read it and like every other customer service rep, he had to show it to his "supervisor" for direction. Some supervisor they are, they poorly advised him to respond from a series of canned click-box replies:


Dear [Crazy, Hungry and Broke],

Thank you for writing Rewards Network Dining for Miles!

We appreciate you taking the time to share your comments.

We appreciate your continued patience. Should you have any questions or concerns please feel free to contact me.

Sincerely, Ricardo [if that is even his real name]

Rewards Network Dining for Miles Internet Services


Dear Ricardo,

Your welcome. Now where's that $50 so I can go grab something to eat? Like the Dining for Miles email said, "I must be starving!"


The Famished Female


I really don't understand how "Ricardo" has a job and I don't. Maybe the Rewards Network Dining for Miles Program is hiring and I can work right next to him. I am pretty sure I can handle clicking the canned response boxes, heck, I might even be able to draft a real letter!

Another fine example of true airline customer service, is one I found from Delta Airlines on the blog YourUnemployedDaughter. YUD, as she calls herself, had a little email conversation going with "Henry" regarding a mixup with the beloved $15 bag fee. I seriously don't think Henry gets it either.

There is a recession here, people, if you didn't notice. Dining out and $15 per bag fee, EACH WAY, is luxury these days. Us unemployed folk track our expenses like a dog tracks bear! Even automotive companies will "take your car back" if you lose your job, what about the airlines? They choose to do nothing but poke fun at our expense by coming up with "snappy" email marketing techniques or rip us off with the ridiculous bag fee. I bet Henry won't be to thrilled once they take that $15 out of his paycheck for being such a prick about it.

I promptly sent YUD my letter to NWA Rewards for Dining Network so she could see that she is not alone in this world of ignoramous airline customer service. Well, she got a kick out of it, and I am elated I could make someone's day a little brighter. I know I felt 100% better after writing it.

Fast forward to this afternoon, in a completely unrelated web-surfing session, I came across a job opening for a Marketing Communications Specialist. Fancy that! I figured if Henry and Ricardo can handle that kind of job, why can't I? Thank you for giving me the confidence to apply for a job I am underqualified for! Yet, after witnessing what kind of writers NWA and Delta hire, I've decided I am a shoe-in.

Thanks to the NWA Rewards Dining for Miles Network and their poor marketing ideas, I now have a primo sample of my work to share.

Monday, August 17, 2009

What is my deal?

I seem to have a problem with motivation. It's not that I don't have any, but I think it's not exactly in the places it needs to be.

I keep thinking about how I am going to get up early and get out the door to do something, but I get so darn side tracked. It's different things every day. Today's example:

Last night I planned out how my day would work:

Get up early
Make coffee
Eat breakfast
Check email, log food intake, etc. while eating breakfast
Workout for 45 min
Head down to MichiganWorks office
Stop in and apply for min wage retail job that I found on internet
Come home for lunch-I have a great new recipe idea! :)

Ok, it's 11 am people and I still have my workout clothes on!!! I also want to add in a walk with my dog because I feel SUPER guilty that I don't take him on walks as often since I started this new exercise program. He needs to lose 4-5 lbs per doctors orders.

The sad part is part of me wants to wait until tomorrow to go down to the "city"..... Ok, enough lazy talk... I need to go for that walk and get moving!

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Ranting for miles program

I received the following email this morning from NWA WorldPerks Dining for Miles program, where you can accumulate airline miles for dining out:


From: Rewards Network Dining for Miles
Subject: Where have you been?

You must be starving!

We noticed you haven't dined out recently, so you didn't earn any WorldPerks® miles with us last month. Wouldn't some WorldPerks miles hit the spot right about now? It's the perfect time to dig back in at some great places like these.

To: Rewards Network Dining for Miles
Subject: Scraping for groceries

Really?! No, Rewards Network Dining for Miles program, I am not starving. I am broke! I am unemployed and cannot afford luxuries right now like DINING OUT. I have no home, I stay with family and friends, horrible credit, and the last thing I think about is buying myself a lavish meal so I can get "airline miles" for a trip I CANNOT AFFORD TO GO ON.

I receive a very SMALL portion of unemployment that covers only the basics in life, and not to mention, I only have 8 weeks of it left! And really, what would I do with airline points right now? I have no right to be taking a vacation! Not to mention, with the $15 A BAG FEE, I cannot afford to use your airline at this juncture of my life.

And NO, I can't charge it on my credit card because I DON'T HAVE ONE. I have screwed up my credit because I use to go on lavish vacations, perhaps flying an airline such as NWA. No.. I don't have what I call a "faulty backup plan" everyone else refers to as CREDIT CARDS.

I'll tell you what would "hit the spot". You send me a check for $50, and I will treat myself to a nice dinner out at one of the "participating restaurants in my area" so I can get rack up a few miles.

Dig back into that, Rewards Network Dining for Miles!!

Wednesday, August 5, 2009

Marlboro sweats and rich old pervy men

I should be working on my book. I should be working on my business plan. I should be looking for jobs. All these little time. You would think with all this free time not working, I could have whipped out a book and a FEW business plans. It just doesn't work that way, and those of you that have been unemployed know exactly what I mean.

The only other time in my life I was unemployed was over 10 years ago, and it was for a few short, yet grueling months. I spent most of my days laying around in these red sweats with the word Marlboro printed down the side. Those days were pretty grim. I gave up my apartment and lived with some friends and their stinky dogs. Really, they were gross. They were cocker spaniels and they would always leave these "little presents", in solid AND liquid form, in the foyer for a greeting as you entered the door. Nasty. They always used Pine Sol to clean it up too, which I found quite disturbing. To this day, if I smell Pine Sol, I will either gag or worse: blow chunks.

I didn't think I would ever find a job, so I took this bartending gig 2 nights a week at this cheesy bar that had line dancing lessons on Mondays and Tuesdays. By day, a Marlboro sweat wearing slob, by night - a tight shirt, mini skirt wearing bartender for the urban cowgirls and pervy old business men of the east side. What a catch I was!

Needless to say, that job didn't last very long. I got tired of the old men that would offer to pay for things in exchange for my company. Ew. I was broke, but not desperate. This one old man, who had to have been in his 80s, always would ask me if I had a fur coat and offer to pay for my college. Seriously, I could have been "Amber Nicole"...thank God I have some pride left at this point. Conversations were never dull with this man, but this one in particular grossed me out so bad that I must over-share:

Rich old pervy man: You need your box fixed?

Me: Excuse me, what did you say?

Rich old pervy man: I said, do you need your box fixed?

Me: What are you talking about?

Rich old pervy man: Well, any girl I've gone out with either needs her box fixed or her teeth fixed, and your teeth look fine to me.

Yes, what a FINE place it was. A few years later, the place had changed names and got some notority from a certain Detroit rap star.... (that I have to admit I had a big crush on).

I digress. My life is not that bad. The Marlboro sweats are long gone and now they've been replaced by the awesome sock monkey slippers I picked up for $7. My nights are spent hanging out with my BBE (best boyfriend ever) or my cousin. I'm either cooking dinner, playing a board game, playing with my sweet little pug or watching a movie. Such a difference a decade makes.

So, now that I have reminisced......and realized things could be a LOT worse, I think I will go ahead and work on that business plan.....